O, mis piernas!
Subi la montana
Habria ido a romperlas!***
si no hubiera tenido la Ellen.

[O, my legs!
I went up the mountain.
I would have broken them
if I hadn’t had the Ellen.]

***This was the only word I could get to rhyme with “piernas.”

//another attempt//

O, mis piernas!
Despues de chocar
con muchas banderas
Anduvieron por el bosque
Los brazos dieron
abrazos a los arboles.

[O, my legs!
After bumping
into many flags
They walked through the woods
The arms hugged
the trees.]

//attempt number 3//

O, mis piernas!
No tienen alegria
Se pusieron
comieron sandia.

[O, my legs!
They were not happy
became weak. Then,
They ate watermelon.]

zomg, AP Calc was not good. [Hi Collegeboard! I’m being utterly vague here. Don’t worry, your questions are safe with me. Or at least I hope you agree that they’re safe with me and that you don’t cancel my scores. Or rather, maybe I should just post the first Calc BC Calculator-section multiple choice question right here (because I remember it) so that my score can be cancelled. But I won’t do that.]

Man, I sure hope the rest of the country’s bad enough at testing to make the curve work for me.

Speaking of curves, I want my equilibrium test back.

Ugh, curves. Vestiges of calculus. I’m such a loser for not learning formulas on my own. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhh. And to make it worse, I made a guess about a certain formula (actually, two) and I was just a tiny detail wrong–and there are NO sympathy points. Ay, me.

I used “hispanoparlantes” in my APSpangLang oral. Too bad I show no command of the language, whatesoever. “El primero vez…”

Time to plow under some Petrarchan sonnets, sow the seeds of nonsense, and then declare the AAA unconstitutional.