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James Joyce, meet rap and physics. Physics and rap, this is Joyce.

High voltage kind of girl
Throwing jewels over seas
Cradling the son of Joseph
In her arms, arms, arms

Driving by, side-by-side
Diving diving to the bayou
Deriving by, in his eye,
Induce’d by a vixel.

Explained:

High voltage kind of girl
Throwing Joules over C’s (coulombs)
Cradling the son of Joseph (Josephson’s constant)
In her arms, arms, arms. (V=IR)

Driving (potential difference drives electrons) by, side-by-side (connect voltmeters in parallel
Diving diving to the bayou (<–this line has no meaning)
Deriving by, in SI
Induce’d by a vixel (voltage drop across an inductor = V_L=IX_L. But if you think of a vixen crossed with a pixel, i.e. porn, then yes, it does take away the ability of some men to do work.)

http://www.fieggen.com/shoelace/index.htm

Shoelaces! Everything you never knew about them.

If I had one of these…

People didn’t like this “chord board” because they were too accustomed to typewriters. But I’m a layperson, and I can imagine myself getting really fast at this relatively quickly! It’s also a helpful little form of sign language. You could communicate so much more in a wave–01010 01011!! (or not.)

If I had one of these, I could type and eat a sandwich at the same time! I could tap out emails with binary precision without setting down a popsicle; I could express wonder and amazement while scratching my head.

One possible improvement would be to add a mouse module to the same hand.

Egads!

More things to do:

1. Grow shoulders. Obviously, the form of push-ups that I can do don’t involve them.
2. Read a lot of books.
3. Er, learn orchestra music!